Leading Through the Fire: Navigating Burnout, Renewal, and Resilience
As a leader, you're often driven and seen as someone destined to lead. But beneath the surface lies a hidden pressure, invisible even to you. Before delving into our blog series on burnout, I decided to survey prominent publications for their take on the topic. Disappointed by the bleak outlook and burdensome 10-step solutions offered, I realized the need for a fresh perspective from someone with personal experience. The prevalent narrative of doom exacerbates the experience of burnout, while prescriptive lists only fuel the cycle of exhaustion, leading to burning out in recovering from burnout.
Why does this matter? I'll delve deeper into it in an upcoming blog on success and happiness. But the main reason is “Your happiness matters because you matter.” While the company and your team may not fully grasp this at a functional level, their operational focus seldom centers on your personal well-being. Rarely do they inquire about your family time or personal aspirations beyond work. Instead, their concerns revolve around Q3 projections and handling underperforming employees like Steve. Sorry Steve.
For the company, the stakes are high as well. Without stable succession plans, each change in leadership, regardless of level, reverberates through client relationships, often leading to revenue loss. Moreover, the pressure mounts on incoming new leaders from day one which is investing in future attrition. Shockingly, statistics reveal a looming exodus: 44% of leaders planning to change companies for advancement, with 26% eyeing departure within a year. Astonishingly, nearly 60% of leaders feel depleted by day's end. As highlighted by Asana's 'Anatomy of Work Special Report,' a staggering 70% of senior leaders admit that burnout clouds their decision-making. Meanwhile, Gallup's recent poll ominously confirms the worsening trend of manager burnout.
Why should you listen to me on this topic? Because I've walked the path of burnout, compassion fatigue, and secondary trauma multiple times throughout my career. As a former Executive Director of a non-profit counseling center, I managed a team of 10-15 counselors and handled a myriad of responsibilities—from development and compliance to client care in cases of abuse and trauma. Picture the pressure of hitting Q3 funding targets, then add the weight of fielding calls from clients in crisis or managing the fallout of heartbreaking situations, like a father kicking his child. Then having to call CPS and manage the county requirements. I understand the relentless cycle, the fear of criticism, the toll on personal life, and the isolation that comes with leadership.
Looking back, I have no doubt that I was headed to an early grave if something didn’t change. I sacrificed personal development, social connections, and, most importantly, genuine presence with my family—not just time. While physically present at family events, my mind and heart often wandered elsewhere, questioning if my absence might have been better. The underlying fear encompassed many dimensions, but failure to the organization, those I was in charge of leading, and being seen as a fraud as a leader weighed on me heavily. We'll delve into this deeper in a later post.
Left untreated, the implications are dire, extending beyond mental health to physical degradation. From heart issues to stomach ulcers, hair loss to autoimmune complications, the toll of burnout is profound. For now, it's important to note that this article focuses solely on individual experiences, not on organizational cultures that may foster burnout—a topic we'll address in a future installment. Stay tuned!
The scary part of it all? I didn't see any of it coming. And that's the crux of burnout—often, it's invisible to the very ones experiencing it. As a leader, you're propelled by your drive, while those around you applaud your achievements. 'Ask Jordan for help, she's so reliable,' or 'Bill, we couldn't do it without you.' These accolades, though well-intentioned, might inadvertently fuel an internal experience hurtling towards breakdown.
Then there's the one person who sees beyond the facade—the one who knows you better than you know yourself. For me, it was my wife. Over coffee one day, she spoke truth: ‘We and you can't keep going like this. You won't be in this position next year.' She saw not only the strain on our family but also the erosion within me. And I'm grateful she spoke up. She is such a gift to me in so many ways.
So, how did it work for me? Firstly, let's acknowledge that burnout doesn't have a one-size-fits-all solution. It's more nuanced and personal than any book or 10-step plan from Forbes can capture. That’s why reading an article or book on it, likely will end in more despair. So, don't expect a magic fix here. But the journey begins with awareness
Becoming self-aware, others-aware, and recognizing the broader systems at play are crucial. And to embark on this journey, you need someone who can provide a safe space for exploration. For me, it was a trusted friend, free from judgment or the need to 'fix' me. It couldn't be those closest to me, like my wife or friends, as they were too affected by my struggles. It couldn’t be colleagues as there could be a conflict of interest in my mind, even if they really cared. And for the record, I had amazing caring colleagues.
You need someone who can delve into the depths with you. What are the rules you grew up with? How has failure shaped you? What internal saboteurs drive you towards burnout? What's the cost to those around you and your company if you don’t or it doesn’t perform to a certain level?
These questions aren't meant for immediate answers—they're examples of the introspection I underwent. In future articles, we'll discuss the need to overhaul our internal operating systems and default procedures.
If you're in a leadership position, have influence over leaders, or are in a relationship with someone in leadership, you're in the burnout playground. Without proactive internal work, burnout is inevitable. I won't hand you a generic list of 10 things to do. Yes, burnout is on the rise, leading many managers to exit the workforce. But amidst the gloom, there's hope. We can use this moment, even the looming threat of burnout, to reclaim control over our lives and rediscover happiness. And quitting your job might not even be necessary.
Ready to take action? First, ask yourself: Are you truly happy, not just successful? Second, seek support from someone who understands burnout firsthand. Don’t run after the books and articles. As informative as they might be, you don’t need more information. You need transformation. Who do you need to reach out to today? If you don’t what is at stake? And, if you do what are the possibilities for you and those around you?
Feel free to take this burnout survey as well if you are curious where you are at
Resources
(1) Asana. (n.d.). Anatomy of Work Burnout: Understanding and Preventing Burnout in America. Retrieved from https://resources.asana.com/americas-anatomy-of-work-burnout-ebook.html
(2) Gallup. (2021, November 18). Manager Burnout Is Getting Worse. Retrieved from https://www.gallup.com/workplace/357404/manager-burnout-getting-worse.aspx
(3) Deloitte. (2022, June 22). Employee Wellness in the Corporate Workplace. Retrieved from https://www2.deloitte.com/us/en/insights/topics/leadership/employee-wellness-in-the-corporate-workplace.html